When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep

Every time I start watching Grey’s Anatomy, I become all obsessive all over again. I just can’t help it. It was the second day of my Season 5 marathon yesterday and I’ve already watched 10 episodes. Tak boleh dan tak mahu berhenti. Ngeks. Which is why saya tidak sesuai menanti setiap minggu dengan sabar, lalu perlu beli DVD haram. Ampunkan saya.

Oh for the record, I bought the complete set of Season 5 in Jakarta, which only cost me RM2 per DVD. Dan gambarnya berkualiti bangat, dong! Talk about penjimatan berganda!

Yeah, this entry is strictly for fans of the Seattle Grace drama.


So apparently Torres likes to process her thought out loud. So do I! Which is why I write. Sebab tak mahu jadi pain in the you-know-what like Torres, troubling everybody with her every thought. See? Writing this out at 3 in the morning refrain me from calling up the Husband simply untuk bercerita tentang obsesi terhadap Grey’s. Yeay me!

That new addition to the hunky team? Dr. Hunt? He’s hot. Not Sloan-hot or McDreamy-mushy-hot. He’s more like Dr. House-hot. Kereks but hot.

Torres and Hahn? Not so hot. Yucky, in fact. Bleurgh. I’m just glad they are over by the 7th episode. Phew.

Why does Meredith have to overanalyze just about everything? Why can’t she just try being happy? But what do I know? I don’t have the great (and troubled) Ellis for my mother.


The softie Alex? Frankly I like him better when he was a jerk. Bosanlah.

The sight of dead Denny Duquette ghost wandering around, looking all gorgeous dengan mata kuyu dan wajah penuh cinta for Izzie? That’s yummy. Disturbing. But yummy.

Eh kenapa semua episod perlu ada tear-jerking scene? Or is it just me?

I must applaud their team of writers. Terlalu hebat. Terlalu, terlalu, terlalu.

And also the team of people who picked the OST and the background music and what not. Lagu-lagu in Grey’s are always perfect; always the perfect songs for the most perfect time.

I could never be a surgeon. Partly because of you-know-why, but mostly because I guess I’m too selfish; I want to live my own life to the fullest. And yeah, I’m a happy, glowy person in general, so I won’t fit in. Ngeh.

I was so happy for George for finally passing his intern exam. Yeay George!


But I hated him for treating Little Grey that way. Lexie deserves better than that. She’s too cute and happy and bright and oh so very nice. She’s happy and glowy, she's like the anti-Meredith.

And I’m so rooting for Sloan-Lexie union. Adakah benar-benar akan berlaku? Don’t tell me, don’t tell me!

Izzie and Denny-the-ghost are just the sweetest. Walaupun agak creepy bermain cinta dengan seorang hantu. Or is it seekor hantu? Whatever. Sigh. Watching them only makes me miss my husband even more.

I stopped watching at 2.30 a.m. It is 3 a.m. on a working night and I couldn’t sleep. Siapa suruh minum Nescafe malam-malam buta? I’d definitely be stoned tomorrow. I’m an obsessive freak. And I can’t sleep and I've got Court tomorrow. Sigh. Somebody please fix me.

A real man knows a real woman when he sees her
And a real woman knows a real man ain’t fraid to please her
And a real woman knows a real man always comes first
And a real man just can’t deny a woman’s worth

Tak suka kan kalau kena kacau dengan lelaki tepi-tepi jalan? Tim Bradley wrote in June edition of CLEO about the nature of catcalling and wolf whistling. He said that it makes him, a man, cringe, and thus he doesn’t see why other men do it. Sudahlah amat tacky, malah kaedah mengorat sebegitu terbukti lebih banyak kegagalan dari kejayaan. He wrote that his girlfriend said that it makes her feel nervous, uncomfortable and sometimes a little unsafe. Hear, hear! How true. It does make me feel all that. Why don’t men get it?

Ada satu scene dalam filem Budak Kelantan, lelaki itu mengorat seorang gadis tepi jalan and it was so nasty and stupid, but strangely, he got her. Dapat response, dapat senyuman manja, dapat phone number. Memang betullah ada orang yang dapatkan gadis dengan kaedah begitu? Miang betul. Kedua-duanya. For the record, saya benci filem itu. Kalau saya orang Kelantan, saya akan lebih benci. Tonton sendiri untuk tahu.

Saya suka dengan kaedah di Arab Saudi. Di sana ada shopping mall khas untuk perempuan. Ini saya tahu melalui buku Girls of Riyadh. According to the book, there in the mall, you can see Muslim girls strutting their sexy dresses and stilettos and what not, sebab tak ada keperluan jaga aurat di situ, juga tak perlu takut dengan hungry look from men. Imagine the freedom! Oh my, sungguh blissful kan?

Di fast food chains di sana, ada 2 bahagian. 1 bahagian untuk keluarga dan lelaki, serta 1 lagi bahagian untuk perempuan saja. Saya tahu ini selepas tonton Anthony Bourdain: No Reservation. Anthony itu, typical American yang sangsi terhadap Islam that he is, tanya pada the woman who was showing him around; tidakkah dia rasa discriminated by men, sebab tempat makan diasingkan begitu? Perempuan itu jawab, tidak langsung, malah terasa privileged sebab perempuan Muslim di sana diberi keistimewaan untuk berasa selesa tanpa gangguan lelaki. Hear, hear!

Bagus betul kalau di sini sebegitu. Mesti sangat selesa boleh shopping dan lepak-lepak amongst women only. Kalau makan seorang diri atau dengan girlfriends, selesa betul sebab tak akan ada lelaki gatal menyibuk.

Tapi nanti mesti ada manusia bermentaliti Anthony Bourdain yang marah; discrimination and oppression oleh Islam terhadap wanita and what not. When in fact, mereka ini yang sebenarnya tak faham darjat dan keistimewaan yang telah diberi terhadap wanita dalam Islam. If you really understand the privilege dan perasaan selamat yang kami rasa dengan pengasingan, dengan menutup aurat, you’d surely agree with me. Muslim women, in the words of writer Aisha Tahira Stacey, are "liberated in the true sense of the word."

Terasa seperti mahu tulis tentang liberation yang saya rasa in embracing the Muslim way of life, tapi nantilah, save that for another entry perhaps. I am not quite sure how to explain it anyway, and also whether I’m the right person to write about it, me in all my TV-loving declaration. Heh. Anyways, as for being catcalled or wolf-whistled, for the record, sumpah saya benci.

To avoid sickness eat less. To prolong life worry less.

I’m all for alternative medication and what not. Perubatan herba, homeopathy, penggunaan ayat-ayat suci Al-Quran; all these are fine with me. Tapi bomoh, oh tidak, tidak. Bomoh tarik duit, kaya tak? Tak, kan? Bomoh pergi hospital tak kalau kena heart attack? Mesti pergi, kan?

Strangely enough, my FIL, a science man that he is (he used to study Engineering in Germany), believes in bomoh. And the Husband, a good son that he is, malas mahu bertekak lalu terpaksa ikutkan saja.

I once followed him with the FIL and the MIL to one bomoh in Simpang Renggam; he claimed that he has the ability menukar jantung secara ghaib. The Husband even recorded the procedure. Yeah, it looked like he was operating on the FIL, with invisible knife and invisible helper. Seriously scary. But funny too, I almost rolled my eyes. The worse part was, the Bomoh’s house was damn filthy and the Bomoh and his family were all selekeh. Yikes. One thing tentang saya ialah saya distrust manusia kotor.

But yeah, the Bomoh did heal the FIL’s diabetic ulcer, with some herbal medication. But as for menukar jantung? That’s BS, if you know what I mean. Few months after the so-called-surgery, last week, the FIL had another heart attack, albeit the new jantung. Memang bohong.

After almost a week at the hospital, the FIL wanted to go see another bomoh in Machap, apparently recommended by a lot of people. My MIL cakap, “Bukannya kena sampuk. Sakit jantung duduklah hospital. Kalau kena sampuk, barulah jumpa bomoh.” Tapi kesian juga, saya faham, kadang-kadang desperate time calls for desperate measures. Lalu last Saturday, we went to Machap, albeit reluctantly. Ngeee.

This Bomoh, adalah muda dan sangat seperti manusia biasa. During his break, he had his meal at the gerai tempat kami menunggu sambil minum, dan saya curi-curi dengar dia berbual. He’s just an ordinary guy who liked his Nasi Goreng and couldn’t wait to watch Transformers. I was expecting a wise old man with janggut and ketayap. Huhu. Oh and the Bomoh, he calls himself Doctor, mind you. Talk about perasan bagus. His ‘clinic’ was packed and we had to wait for hours! The Husband went inside and saw the Bomoh performed one ‘heart surgery’ and he said he almost let out a loud laugh.

But yeah, like I said before, desperate time calls for desperate measures. Sometimes people are so sick of western medications, sick of having to stay at the hospital, sick of having to pay thousands for medications and sick of waiting to heal. Dan bomoh, mereka janjikan perubatan murah dan cepat.

Oh please don’t get me wrong, saya percaya dengan ubat-ubatan tradisional. Saya percaya Allah jadikan macam-macam ubat dalam bentuk herba dan sebagainya. Saya juga percaya dalam kuasa ayat-ayat Al-Quran dalam menyembuhkan penyakit, terutamanya penyakit-penyakit halus yang tak tercapai dek perubatan moden. Saya percaya itu semua. Yang paling saya percaya, usaha dan tawakal adalah wajib dan selanjutnya adalah terserah kepada takdir Allah.

Tapi kalau saya sakit, tolonglah jangan bawa pergi jumpa bomoh perasan doktor itu. Bring me to a real doctor, please?

There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle
Sometimes you going to have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

Blog bersawang (bersawang for my standard-lah) lalu ingin kemas kini dengan sepuluh butir-butir ringkas (ringkas for my standard-lah).

1. Saya sakit jiwa dengan kerja. Kerja sangat banyak tapi man-power sangat sedikit. Seorang peguam telah pergi dan seorang lagi akan pergi tidak lama lagi. Yeah, that was the upsetting news I wrote about on Friday. Since the news was already out sekarang, I guess I could write openly about it. To make it worse, the lawyer leaving is the Boss. Mati ke tak mati? Siapa nak buat semua kerja Boss? Siapa? Siapa lagi!


2. Saya menyampah dengan Julia Roberts. She was quoted to say bahawa duit dia sangat banyak, malah tak akan habis kalau guna dalam 10 kelahiran sekalipun. Menyampah, kan? Saya suka dia sebab dia ada wajah tersengih yang sungguh mesra, tapi saya menyampah sebab dia ada duit berlebih-lebihan. Derma sini sikit, please, pretty Julia please?


3. Saya kagum dengan kemurahan tiket MAS. Saya telah mendapatkan tiket pulang ke KL pada Jumaat depan dengan harga RM79 saja (all inclusive)! Tiket murah sebab semua orang bimbangkan kemerebakan Swine Flu? Me too, but I need to go home to send my parents off to Umrah (my Husband would be in KL earlier untuk berkursus) and the ticket price is too hard to resist-lah. I guess I’d just have to bertawakal kepadaNya.

4. Saya betul-betul rasa batik yang kami jual sangat murah. Sumpah murah. Saya selalu tempted mahu beli untuk diri saya sendiri. RM230 (to RM260) for Batik? That’s freaking cheap, girls. Kerana ia adalah kain sutera/chiffon/crepe gred A yang senang dibasuh/digosok/dijaga. Cuba pergi tengok-tengok di Jalan TAR atau Angsana atau Jakel, boleh tak dapat harga lebih murah? Saya rasa Pasar Payang saja yang boleh beat harga kami, and for that, you’d have to go to KT yourself. Itupun belum tentu tau. Hehe. Maka, marilah beli, kawan-kawan ya. Ngeee.

5. Saya bosanlah lihat rupa blog saya. Selepas saya siapkan blog batik itu dan blog untuk Kano (dalam 5 templates berlainan, rajin kan saya?), saya rasa blog saya kelihatan sangat hambar. Tapi saya suka juga the fact that I use a basic Blogger template; saya rasa ia beri impression bahawa I’m a serious blogger. Serious in the sense that I blog simply because I love to write. Tapi bosanlah. Bosan tak?

6. Saya rasa terharu dengan apa yang Arin tulis tentang saya di blog barunya: Ah! Sudah tentu dia baik. Dia menarik. Dia bijak. Dia ada blog yang mempunyai entri yang penuh inspirasi. Aaaawh! Saya doa pada Allah agar Dia kabulkan doa Arin dan seterusnya saya akan betul-betul jadi baik, menarik, bijak dan memberi inspirasi. Ameen.


7. Saya sangat suka episod Ugly Betty semalam. Pernah ke saya tak suka? Saya malah rasa sangat rugi kalau tertinggal satu episod sebab natijahnya akan terlepas peluang untuk dapat tempias positif dari siri yang sungguh ceria, bertenaga dan positif itu. Saya dengar Betty’s braces are coming off in the 4th Season (gasp!) Comelnya! You’re not a fan? I urge you to be one.


8. Saya berdebar betul mahu daftarkan diri di gym. Saya berdebar mahu berikan komitmen saya. Saya suka berjoging tanpa paksaan di taman bunga sambil dengar suara burung dan rehatkan mata dengan kehijauan rumput. Tapi ada bagusnya saya sertai gym, sebab saya ini jenis sangat sayangkan duit. Bila sudah bayar, tentu saya rasa rugi jika tak pergi. Gym baru di Danga City Mall itu surprisingly affordable dan cantik dan ada trainer dan ada sauna dan ada free classes; in theory, agak tempting-lah. The Husband is pretty excited about it. Should I or should I? Jom, Dod? Boleh tumbuk muka aku masa kick-boxing class nanti? Tempting, yes?

9. Saya rasa bangga sebab Facebook telah tauliahkan saya sebagai A Real F.R.I.E.N.D.S Fan yang malah tahu apakah itu Transponster. Of course I know what Transponster is! That’s one of my favourite episodes ever! Saya yakin semua peminat siri itu tahu. Comel sangatlah. Soalan pertama kuiz itupun saya jawab tanpa fikir panjang. What is Tag's family name? Senang sangatlah soalan, tak mencabar tau (ya, berlagak di sini). Eh you don’t know the answer? Shame on you. Haha. Gurau kasar.

10. Saya mahu lompat-lompat di awan bersama Doraemon. Tak naklah. Saya mahu jadi partikel halus terbang-terbang seperti Arin. Tak naklah. Saya mahu pergi memancing di satu tasik yang tenang sambil baca buku dan dengar lagu-lagu yang soothing dalam iPod saya. Tak naklah. Saya mahu tonton wayang sambil makan Cheezels dan minum Ribena. Tak naklah. Oh oh! Saya tahu! Saya mahu pergi backpacking in Europe seperti dalam lagu Yuna itu and learn to say HELLO in 7 languages and what not. Sigh.

Puan Julia Roberts, belanjalah saya, please pretty please?

"Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply
didn't know where to go shopping" - Bo Derek


COME VISIT OUR BATIK SALES BLOG!

If you're interested, you know how to reach me ;)

GO CRAZY, GIRLS!

Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong

Pernah tak hadapi hari yang everything goes wrong dari pagi sampai ke petang? That, my friend, is what Murphy’s Law is all about. Murphy’s Law is an adage accepted in the Western culture that "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong."

Pagi ini, saya terlewat ke Mahkamah. Kemudian, apabila sudah hampir tiba, tersedar bahawa both of my blazers were at the office; called my friends untuk meminjam but Mazia was in KL and Elin didn’t pick up. So I had to make a detour to the office and asked my secretary to bring it down to the lobby. Sampai Mahkamah, the Judge has already stepped out of his Court. It’s a good thing that (almost) all of the Court staffs here are helpful, hence problem solved. On the way to the office, hit something lalu tayar pancit sepenuhnya. Sampai office, I learned one upsetting (and shocking!) news that I am not in the position to reveal here. But yeah, it is U-P-S-E-T-T-I-N-G! Sigh. And the day isn’t over yet, people.

Kindred Spirit saya pernah yakinkan saya bahawa we human are creatures of adaptation. We can adapt to the changes all around us. We better be; kalau tidak, hidup akan jadi terlalu sukar. We can wake up one day to find that ASTRO has discontinued the rerun of FRIENDS (gasp!) The whole blocks of the apartment we live in could be burnt overnight. Or worse, something bad could happen to someone we love in a blink of an eye. Tapi untuk teruskan hidup dengan tenang, kita perlu juga cuba adapt.

Adaptive people (if there’s such term) akan hadapi hidup dengan lebih mudah. Kereta rosak and late for work? Naiklah cab (I had my first taxi ride in JB kelmarin. I had fun reading all the way home. But that’s another story) Kena pindah Dubai? Why not? If nothing else, setidak-tidaknya dapat learn new culture. Putus cinta? Why bother? Move on and scream NEXT! Heh. When change occurs, be it something good or bad, adaptive people will always land on their feet! Baguslah jadi adaptive people, mesti sangat tenang.

I cannot safely say that I am easily adaptable. I like everything to be mapped out. But I don’t actually go berserk if something in my schedule becomes out of order. I’m moderate I guess, yeah I’m dull like that.

Nak adapt dengan manusia dan environment pun satu lagi hal. It’s a challenge, for some people, including myself sometimes. There’s a fine line between adapting and forgoing our self, I think. Kena pandai-pandailah adjust. Adapt, tapi jangan sampai let go of your true self. Nenek moyang kita dari dahulu kala lagi dah pesan, “Masuk kandang kambing mengembek, masuk kandang harimau mengaum.” (Good one, ancestors! Definitely much better than your “Jangan sampai pisang berbuah kali” advice)

At my previous firm, my crowd adalah bekas budak-budak UIA yang mengagumkan. Contoh: Kano ialah Naib Presiden MPP (kan, Kakak?) dan Suhail adalah bekas Presiden PKPIM. Saya pula bekas kutu rayau UiTM yang suka merambu dan berpeleseran di shopping complex. But we adapted to each other and became good friends.

Sekarang, rakan baik saya di firma ini is a self-proclaimed shopaholic yang stylish dan must have all the must-haves of the season. Dia juga rasa saya manusia gila sebab suka sangat baca dan beli buku when she doesn’t even read the news. Although we are almost as different as the day and night, ours is a friendship that works, because we accept and adapt to each other.


Saya merapu saya tahu. But I just want to get my points across. Faham kan? Bahawa we are creatures of adaptation? Bahawa if we make some effort, we can adapt to different situation, people and lifestyle? Bagus.

Jadi, untuk hidup yang lebih tenang, don’t sweat the small stuffs dan mari kita jadi adaptive people (I seem to be very fond of this term walaupun tak tahu kesahihannya?) Dan yang paling penting, Rasulullah SAW yang kita cintai itupun dah kata: “Sungguh mengagumkan urusan orang mukmin, semua perkara baginya baik belaka, semua ini tidak didapati oleh orang lain kecuali orang mukmin: Jika dia mendapat kesenangan, dia bersyukur, maka itu baik baginya, dan jika dia ditimpa kemudaratan, dia bersabar, maka itu baik baginya.”

Tayar pancit? Apa susah? Suami kan ada! Ngeh ngeh.

“If I don't write to empty my mind, I go mad” - Lord Byron

THE RULES: (1) Write five (5) interesting facts about the person who gave you this award. (2) Jot down ten (10) interesting facts about yourself or your hobbies. (3) Pick your ten (10) most deserving receipients and describe them. (4) Leave a comment on the receipients' blog to tell them they've been tagged. (5) Paste the award badge in your sidebar.

ABOUT THE AWARD GIVER: Sis Dilla is a super, super senior of mine and like she said, our time in STF never overlapped. But from what I gathered from her blog, I think that she is one heck of a woman! She seems to be a very happy person, which is natural I think, because most STFians I know are generally happy people. Teehee. And she writes really well.

ABOUT ME: No you’re not going to get 10 facts about me today. One fact and one only: I have the fear of being stuck somewhere without something to read. For this reason, I almost always carry newspapers/magazines/iPod with downloaded short stories/books everywhere I go.

ABOUT THE RECEPIENTS OF THE AWARD: There are many, many blogs that I devotedly stalk, because they are super amazing, but I decide to limit this 10 recepients to those who I am actually friends with (read: online friends count as well). And they are:

Ayin Emran: Yin & Yang.
As you may already know, Ayin is one of my favourite girls. Ayin and I, we go way back; we’ve been best friends since we were both 16. Her blog is entertaining because she shares her easy-to-do home meal recipes, she (mostly) writes in perfect Malay and her husband and she herself are incredibly good photographers, so you can expect beautiful pictures accompanying her every posts. And of course, I love her to bits.

Ayuni: Kembali.
We’ve known each other more than a decade now; we were roomies back then. This good friend of mine is a gem of a writer. I wish she’d realize that.

Chika: Nurulism.com.
It was a strange coincidence, the way I stumbled upon this girl’s blog. Someone posted some comment at the infamous Piah’s blog, listing the blogs that she (or he) hates. And mine and Chika’s happened to be in the list. I clicked on her link to check out her blog and I came to the conclusion that the prankster (who left the hateful comment) was merely jealous of this Chika girl. She’s pretty, she’s well-off, she’s smart, she’s funny and she shares just about everything of her interesting life. Thus, you either would really hate her blog (read: jealous) or would really like it. And I happen to really like it.

Suhail: A Thing to Ponder.
The blogger and I used to be colleagues back in KL. I’ve never known him in the capacity of a leader that he is, but I heard that he was worshipped back in UIA. Haha. He has ceased practising law for quite sometime now and has been very active in his global volunteer work in an attempt to spread the beauty of Islam. Kagum. Suhail is currently in China and you can read all about his interesting journey there together with useful anecdotes on Islam, and for that, I think A Thing to Ponder is an amazing read.

Reena: Life Is a Big Canvas.
She’s the daughter of my mom’s best friend, so you can say that we’re practically cousins. Haha. Hers is one of the few blogs that I visit religiously. Even at the office! (and I rarely blog-hop during office hour, mind you) She mostly writes about entertainment, the movies she likes, the make-up she wears, blouses she buys, actors she dreams about; mostly fun stuffs. A fun read, that’s for sure!

Chics In Red: Bootylicious.
A senior of mine, she is one of those we call, the daily bloggers, simply because she updates everyday without fail, which means that I can always count on her for a good dose of laugh every single day. Mostly, I think I like her blog so much because she writes candidly with an open honesty.

Anis Liyana: A Simple Reminder.
She’s my Kindred Spirit’s little sister. Her blog is aptly named, because that is mainly what the blog is all about. She writes simple, everyday reminders that all of us Muslim could do with. She’s so young and yet so bright; you’d be inspired to be a better Muslim after reading her reminders. I know I do.

Naziatul Azrin: My Own Version.
Suhail introduced me to Arin few years back. A fellow litigation lawyer, she shares her ups and downs as a lawyer in her blog and she writes in perfect, beautiful Malay. Too bad she is currently taking her time off blogging; I hope that this award will boost her spirit to blog again.

Ninie: The Yoga Instructor Diaries.
A fellow Srikandi 959, Ninie is one hot yoga instructor, and I’m proud to say that we used to be classmates. Haha. She’s hot, successful and writes really well too. I guess I could say that she is the epitome of the maxim “every good thing comes in small packages.”

Sharel Wahid: Funkstar’s Second Chapter.
He refers to me as his ‘oldest friend’. Yeah I guess you can say that; in the sense that we’ve known each other since we were 6. We went to the same cool kindergarten and even to the same primary school. We stumbled upon each other again in uni and have been in contact since via blogs. He’s married to another schoolmate of mine and they’re expecting their first child. He rarely updates his blog but when he does, you get to see some good writings and pretty pictures plastered all over his blog.


I’d like to share 2 blogs that I really, really like but since they don’t even know I exist (that sounds pathetic), I did not include them in the above list.

Amir Hafizi: The Malay Male.
He never fails to amuse me with his sharp, witty anecdotes.

Hanis Zalikha: Ini Belog Saya.
The girl is beauty, intelligence and wit all rolled into one.


Sinclair Lewis once said, “It is impossible to discourage the real writers - they don't give a damn what you say, they're going to write.” So keep on writing, people. You know you’ve got a fan in me!

If you wanna get free and if you wanna do the passionate thing
And if you wanna get smart for the sake of your heart and all
You should own your name and stand up tall
And get real and see the beauty in ugly

So you ask what is the Shout! Awards? Created to give recognition to those who have made great impact and creative breakthroughs in Malaysian music, film, TV and radio, it aims to reward the most-deserving artists, actors, radio and TV faces. It’s also a platform for the fans to voice out their definition of the new cool in the entertainment scene. Cool, huh? It’s like our own MTV Award! And the categories are cool as well.

For our music scene, the categories are: (1) Rockstar Award. (2) Popstar Award (Aizat is a nominee and he undoubtedly has my vote). (3) Power Vocal Award (This is a no brainer, of course I voted for Dato’ Siti. Shut up. Haha). (4) Flava Award. (5) Break Out Award (For Best New Act; but Joe Flizzow and Malique are among the nominees, they’re not exactly new, right?)

For the TV and film scene, there are: (1) Best On Screen Chemistry (Upin & Ipin are nominated, y’all! And I totally voted for them! Haha) (2) Fresh TV Series. (3) Award Breakthrough Film Award. (4) Favorite TV Program. (5) Favorite TV Host. The 2 latter categories are actually the reason I signed up to vote. I genuinely believe that Destinasi Bajet and its host, Qushairi deserve the proper recognition. He’s a fun host and Destinasi Bajet is one fun travelogue show! Beats Samantha Brown anytime.

For the radio scene, the categories are Coolest Radio Announcer and Favorite Radio Show. Fly FM dominates most of the nominations. Ayuni must be pleased. Heh.

And lastly, the general categories consist of the (1) Stylo Award (Most Stylish Awards), (2) Hot Chick Award and (3) Hot Guy Award. I was very excited because I get to vote for one pretty, pretty girl that I really, really like, Marion Caunter, for the Hot Chick Award. Was torn between Fazura and Marion, but Marion wins my vote because she’s cute as a button, she’s got the best bod around, she speaks both Malay and English fluently and she’s dating the NAZA big guy. How more cool can she be?

Go HERE to register and cast your vote, people.


And speaking of award, a super-senior of mine, Sis Dilla, awarded me with one cool blogger award, the Uber Amazing Award, and this is what she has to say about my blog: “I only discovered this jewel of a blabbering mouth earlier this year. And what an interesting read she has provided me. Witty, funny and sharp. Loyar, rupanya. Dan dah tentu seorang Srikandi :) Eventhough our secondary schooling time did not overlap, I feel an overwhelming connection to this girl. It's called sisterhood, y'all.”

Aaawh that’s just too sweet of you, Sis! Flattered, I am.

The rule is, I have to pass this award to 10 blogs that I think are uber-amazing. It’s kacang putih actually because I read a lot of cool blogs but I think I’d have to take some time to karang the proper testimonial regarding each and every blogs that I choose. So I’m just going to do this later-lah.

I must say that it’s always nice to be given the stamp of approval. As Robert Brault put it, “There is no effect more disproportionate to its cause than the happiness bestowed by a small compliment.”

But really, knowing that someone out there reserve 5 minutes of their day to read my silly writings is an award enough to me. Really :)

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle

1. It’s Monday. I’m bored and lazy. Got a submission to be finalized by today and I have yet to even begin. I’ve got nothing special to blog about but since it’s been a while since I last updated, I thought I’d just bebel-bebel for the sake of menyapu sawang. Feel free to leave because I’ll be writing crap.

2. I had the greatest time meeting Ayin and her husband Zul for (overpriced) coffee on Friday. It has been a while since we last met; it was last Raya I think, and I was a bit more kurus back then. Hep, please refrain from staring directly into my double chin! Haha. We borak, borak and borak like nobody’s business. Kesian Zul had to just sit there and blend in our petty, girly tête-à-tête. I was very relieved when my Husband finally showed up to keep Zul company. Haha. I miss you already, babe.

3. Speaking of overpriced coffee, it has been quite sometime since I last tasted Starbucks yummylicious drinks. Coffee Bean has since replaced my love for Starbucks, albeit reluctantly. Coffee Bean’s Black Forest Ice Blended is heavenly but their selections are no match to Starbucks’. Sangat limited. But boycott is boycott, and as long as I can bear living without Starbucks coffee, Coffee Bean menjadi teman tatkala kepingin kopi mahal. Ngeh.

4. Anyways, my Sunday was eventful. We woke up early and went for morning jog at the beautiful Kebun Bunga. Had delicious Mihun Soto at the Hutan Bandar for breakfast and spent hours there reading Sunday newspapers (Saya sangat suka surat khabar Ahad! The Star, especially! Terlalu!) Stopped by the Suzuki outlet to check out their Swift promotion. Lazed around and watched TV while the Husband did some work (kesian dia). Ordered in some pizza and some chicken wings for lunch (so much for exercise, huh?) Went to Giant to get some groceries and later at night, we went to a friend’s beautiful wedding ceremony. It was a great Sunday!

5. Oh, I’m letting go of my red hot Savvy. Friday was our last day together (sob!) and tonight, my brother-in-law is driving it to KL for good. I’ve traded it in for another car, a second-hand, non-Malaysian car. I’ve had enough with Malaysian car; Proton’s to be exact. I love my Savvy but it has been giving me a lot of problems in its 3rd year. Costly problems, I must add. Sigh. I’m currently car-less, but I like having the Husband sending me to work!

6. Look people, isn’t Canon Ixus 870 IS a dream? Look at that sleek body with that pretty chrome finishing! I’m in love. I’ve been yearning for a good compact camera since forever, which is quite silly actually, sebab kami sudah ada a good, basic DSLR. But I really want a small camera that I can carry around everywhere. I already saved some money but the fund had to be used for a small business project, so I have to resave again now. Zul told me that Canon Ixus 870 IS is the best compact camera around and I’ve stumbled upon many good reviews about it as well. Bersabarlah wahai Ixus 870 IS, you’ll be mine someday.

7. What business project, you ask? Me and my two best friends, Far the Kindred and Dod, kini menjadi Gadis Penjual Batik Terengganu. Ngeh ngeh. I’ve sold a number of pieces to my friends, colleagues and relatives. Would you be interested if I sell the Batik online? Once you see the beautiful, grade A quality of the Batik, you’d be mesmerized, I assure you. And we are selling them at much, much lower price than what other people are selling. Trust me. Any cheaper, you’d have to go to Terengganu yourself. Itupun belum tentu. Ngeee. If you’re interested, I’ll upload them ASAP. Tunggu!

8. I’m dying to go to the Singapore Big Sale. Too bad I don’t have the budget for it. People, if you’re planning on doing some shopping, this is a good time to go to Singapore. My friend told me that the sale was madness. You can get a Guess watch that would cost you RM1000 ++ here, at $300 ++ with 40% discount. How crazy is that? Silalah. I will just bersabar over here in JB. Heh. Oh and on the way there, bila lalu JB, feel free to contact me and belanja I minum, I’d never say no to kopi mahal. Haha.

Marliza Radzi out!

We are born wet, naked, and hungry. Then things get worse.

Kalau bandingkan diri dengan orang yang kerja sikit boleh lepak-lepak tapi gaji banyak, mestilah rasa macam sakit hati. Kerja kuat tapi gaji setakat cukup-cukup makan, kais sebulan, makan sebulan.

Kalau bandingkan diri dengan perempuan yang hidup sempurna dengan duit banyak dan anak ramai, memanglah rasa diri sendiri macam loser; belum kaya malah belum punya anak seorangpun lagi.

Kalau bandingkan diri dengan model cantik kurus kering yang makan gajahpun tak gemuk-gemuk, mestilah rasa geram dengan metabolisme diri sendiri yang semakin diminishing dan nafsu makan yang semakin increasing. Not a pretty-looking graph, I must say.

Kalau bandingkan diri dengan anak raja yang lahir-lahir atas dulang emas yang boleh kerja main-main sebab their whole life has been taken care of, mestilah rasa macam dunia ini tak adil pada kita. They get to have all the privilege without even having to struggle for anything, how unfair.


Tapi cuba bandingkan diri dengan orang yang tiba-tiba tak dapat provide for his family sebab kena retrench selepas bekerja kuat all his life.

Cuba bandingkan diri dengan orang yang tiba-tiba disahkan hidap penyakit bahaya dan hanya ada few months to live.

Cuba bandingkan diri dengan manusia yang lahir dalam keluarga papa-kedana yang terpaksa start from scratch to secure future yang lebih baik. Or worse, couldn’t even get a good future due to their humble beginning; perlu terus hidup susah sampai mati sebab tak pernah ada peluang yang terbuka.

Cuba bandingkan diri dengan manusia-manusia yang diuji Allah dengan jenayah perang; with those entire post-war trauma. Hilang keluarga, hilang harta benda, hilang tujuan hidup.


There’s this article, Voices from the Rubble that I read in the Time magazine. Satu kisah kecil dari ribuan kisah kesedihan perang di Gaza. Khaled Abed Rabu, seorang bapa yang lihat tiga orang anak perempuannya ditembak tanpa sebab oleh Israeli soldiers. These Israeli soldiers, punyalah kurang ajar, sambil tembak, sambil makan keropok dan coklat. It was like a picnic to them; firing the M-16 towards the innocent girls was like a part of their sick entertainment. At first, they didn’t even let Khaled take his girls to the hospital; he was beaten and they even smashed the ambulance against his house and crushed it like sand. By the time they reached the hospital, it was too late. Two of his girls died on their way there. One is still recovering from the shock and physical trauma. How is Khaled ever going to recover? Tak dapat terbayang. Innalillah.

The Israeli military office had the nerve to say, "The Israel Defense Forces is an ethical army and has no knowledge of such an incident." Macam syaitan.

Selepas baca kisah itu, cuba jeling-jeling dalam jiwa, rasa bersyukur tak sekarang dengan hidup yang seindah biasa ini? I know I am.

“Welcome to real life. It sucks. You’re gonna love it!”
- Monica Geller in FRIENDS.

Watching Monica said goodbye to Rachel on FRIENDS this morning and stalking Zaza’s photos of her last few days in uni, reminds me of the day I left the small, cozy house I rented with my best friends in my uni years. It was truly a sad day, watching our empty room as Far packed her stuffs away. There were just too many memories there.

We laughed, we bickered, we fought, we did so many things together, my best friends and I, but mostly we laughed.

(4 out of 8 of) my girls and I, on our last day at our busuk Law School.
4 tahun yang lalu. It's amazing how fast time flies.

I miss my girls so much. It’s not the same nowadays. It could never be. We’re suck into the exhausting rate race of real life. We got ourselves new crowds. We moved on. I miss the olden good days.

When everything was much simpler. When I didn’t have bills to fret about. When I could spend the whole evening hanging out with friends like nobody’s business. When I didn’t have to worry sick about deadlines and what not. When I didn’t have to constantly wait until the 28th for my monies, knowing that JPA and my parents will take care of that. When I had Far by my side 24/7. When I knew my angels were just a phone call away. When I didn’t have to get all stressed out with people around me who finds joy in asking me about babies and stuff. When the only stress I knew about was the day before the exam. Yikes. Yeah, back when everything was much simpler.

But yes, with an ending comes a new beginning. Leaving school means getting myself the career I’ve always dreamt of, albeit exhausting, it’s mine and I’m thankful for it. Leaving friends means getting new friends, and I’ve been blessed with some very good friends along the way. Leaving my parents means getting to venture into this wonderful, wonderful married life. And I’m thankful to Allah for all that.

Real life sucks, but I guess I love it.