“You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.” - Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"
Do I look pregnant to you? Do I? Do I? I know I’m a bit on the chubby side lately. Okay maybe not a bit. I AM chubby. But to ask me whether I am pregnant?! I don’t think I look THAT chubby! You, you and you - yes the 3 of you who dared to ask – you are so mean! I know you did not mean to hurt my feeling but you did. Because no, I’m not pregnant, I’m just, ermm… still dealing with my post-pregnancy body issue. Sentap okay!
So it has been 5 months and I am still as chubby. Biarlah! Nangis karang baru tahu. Bluwek. It took 9 months (more in my case, of course) to gain all those pregnancy fat so can I not at least give myself another 9 months to get back to my pre-pregnancy body? I know it seems impossible to be as skinny as I was when I was 22 so I’m taking all the advice I got; to be kind to myself and accept that I am chubby. For now. Isk.
While breastfeeding helped me got back to my pre-pregnancy weight rather easily, I must say that it is also a major hindrance (“Major hindrance” sambil tabik – HIMYM fans’ inside joke) for further weight loss. Breastfeeding mothers would understand; you’re definitely gonna stay bigger you-know-where and yes, you don’t get to diet. But breastfeeding is not a valid excuse, right? There are many hot breastfeeding mothers, I know! Pffftt!
I OFFICIALLY HATE YOU, HEIDI KLUM!
Haish. Thank you Blogger, for merely existing, providing me with my very own space to bebel like nobody’s business. But the first person that had to suffer due to my internal suffering was of course lah the Hubby. The Yahoo Messenger conversation which started with “Hubby, Wifey sentap ni” was ended with a simple, comforting note: “Yang penting Hubby rasa Wifey tak gemuk. Hot and spicy.” Too sweet, no? But he is my husband! He is designed to make me feel better. Kah kah. I am a complex being. Most women are!
If you have given birth and feel fat, raise your hands in the air and scream with me, “I am chubby, not pregnant!” Boleh geng. Siapa kurus, pergi main jauh-jauh, tak mahu kawan.
Nak pergi join Foxy Farah sentap dengan Rozita Che Wan sebab dia ramai anak tapi hot. Pffftt!