Stress is poison ~ Agavé Powers

Warning: This is going to be a long entry yang penuh dengan rungutan. So, brace yourself and before that, pray for my Bapak for Allah’s love and blessings, for today is his birthday. I love you more than love, Bapak.

Whining mode switched on: Yesterday after my Court matter, I went straight home. Sakit kepala tak hengat. I think what has been giving me headache beberapa hari ini was stress. A fellow lawyer told me a doctor once gave him 2 days leave, for stress semata2. Apahal nak stres-stres, ni? Hmm. I think I need a brief leave from all these legal bla bla and find a stress-free job. Mana ada?! Semua job ada stress. Except that I want one yang although ada stress, the amount of fun is enough to balance stress itu.

Huhu. Do not get me wrong. I like what I do. And I bersyukurlah. But I must say, the gaji is (kinda) ciput, considering the fact that some of us (me included) did not get the increment unlike the others sebab kami ‘belum cukup setahun’. I mean, come on lah, shouldn’t increment be based on performance? Ini yang buat aku demotivated ni. Aku terus fikir. "Aah takyahlah kerja teruk2, in the end, bukan tengok performance pun”. Huh.

Tapi, ada juga perkara yang compensate all these work stress and gaji ciput, seperti, (a) ehem, niat kerja kerana Allah, (b) the fact that I suka jugalah going to Court, and (c) that the environment in my department is syok, macam family-like. Although ada juga certain people yang irritates the hell out of me sometimes. Okay do not get me started on that.

The point is, I love being a lawyer. But sometimes I think I deserve better.. ermm, appreciation? Jadi, it is either: (a) finish my contract here and go somewhere else with better pays, or (b) finish my contract here and go find some temporary job macam buat kek, jadi wartawan sambilan Karangkraf, jadi registered translator, jadi jurugambar amatur, jadi stage manager kecil-kecilan, jadi freelance writer, or I could (c) quit job and melepak tengok tv.

And if I choose (c), soon I’ll be complaining about being bored and penniless pulak. Hahaha. Saiko, saiko.