Television is an anesthetic for the pain of the modern world

After sahur today, I watched a tazkirah program aired on RTM1. Sadly, the Ustaz made a rather comical generalization about genggaman tangan; bagaimana lelaki dan wanita sepatutnya menggenggam tangan. The left picture shows genggaman tangan lelaki and on the right, wanita. I don't know if this is true, but in my ignorance, I'd like to believe that this is according to the Ustaz. The ustaz went on saying, “Jadi para lelaki, sebelum berkahwin, periksalah bakal isteri anda, bagaimana dia menggenggam tangan. Jika seperti ini (he shows genggaman like the one in the right picture), maka baguslah, lemah-lembut dan perempuanlah dia. Dan jika lelaki pula, jika dia genggam seperti ini (masih menunjukkan genggaman like the one in the right picture), ada sesuatu yang tak kenalah pada lelaki itu. Mungkin dia ‘aww’ sedikit.” Like, what?! I unashamedly mengaku that my genggaman tangan is like the one on the left picture; yes, the genggaman tangan lelaki. Why? Not because I am not lemah-lembut enough or that I am not a real perempuan. It is simply because from my early years, I’ve been learning Taekwando and that is how we are supposed to genggam tangan for punching effect. Tidak, tidak. Bad generalization. Otherwise, it would be a good, entertaining tazkirah.

Wahida (Wassini) on the talk show Hijrah Remaja yesterday posed an excellent question: “Jika seorang lelaki berada dalam keadaan di mana ibu dan isterinya kedua-duanya sedang lemas, who would (and should) he save first?" Remaja wanita kesemuanya menjawab ibu, kerana jika isteri yang lemas, lelaki boleh berkahwin lain. Tetapi ibu hanya satu. I agree, but for different reason. My husband should save his mother first, not because I am replaceable, but because I don’t want my husband to be anak derhaka because of me, which in return would also timbal balik on me di dunia dan akhirat. Plus, although I myself tak pandai berenang, I believe I could (and would) find a way to save myself. Heh. And more, I would want my own Little Bro to save my Ibu first in any given situation. Heh. Any other answer or reasoning, do let me know, people.

Passion makes the world go round.
Love just makes it a safer place.

(Another) new skin, people. Some people have been giving me negative feedback about my previous skin, which I like for its simplicity. It never ceased to amaze me the fact that what (and especially how) people say can truly affect my mood. It is not easy being an intense being; too happy or too sad. Really, it is nerve wrecking. Anyways, I found out that the skin does not work well on some PCs and hence the change. A friend of mine once said, real blogger use Blogger-provided-skin; hence the skin, which by the way, I really, really like. You people must think I have a lot of time on my hand. Tidak. I have a research due. But shares, stockbroker and contract note are really not my forte, hence the boredom. Boredom yang terjadi akibat tidak dapat crack the code for the research. Huhu. Seketika sajapun proses penukaran skin. Apa-apapun, again, feel free lah to comment eh. Hehe. Akhir kata, have a good day dan selamat berpuasa, people.

"There is a gate of Paradise called Rayyan through which only those will enter on the Day of Judgment who are regular in observing the fast and no one else."
(Bokhari and Muslim)

Today is the first day of Ramadhan. Betapa terujanya untuk memeriahkannya in my own humble way. Suatu kisah menarik untuk dikongsi: In my neigbourhood, there is this one Indian lady whom my Ibu and her friends recently helped in converting into Islam. Yesterday she called Ibu asking about puasa Ramadhan: niat, masa, larangan dan suruhan. How her heart was opened to Islam is, Subhanallah, kuasa Allah Yang Maha Kuasa. She had an accident and was in comma for few months. Apabila terbukanya matanya, the first phrase she uttered was the Kalimah Syahadah, which shocked the nurse who attended her, as in record, she was a Hindu. She asked where she was at, as all the while, she believed she was in a mosque: iktikaf, solat, mengaji dan berzikir (when she was actually in comma in reality). Dipendekkan cerita, dia kemudiannya menjejaki Masjid committee, untuk memeluk Islam. Betapa untungnya dia dibantu Allah, diberi peluang, laksana being reborn. The thing is, she is currently staying with a non-Muslim friend whose husband recently died in a car accident: the friend blamed the fact that she converted as the cause of her husband’s death. Betapa sukarnya wanita ini ingin menjadi Muslim yang baik di dalam keadaan itu: lack proper guideline, lack Muslimah’s circle of support, tekanan dari sahabat, berada di dalam rumah yang tidak mengamalkan Islam; and yet, she is determined to be a good Muslim. MasyaAllah, kagumnya. I am going to leave you guys to get on with your puasa and amalan, but not before sharing this Doa Kumail which I encountered, a doa Imam 'Ali gave to one Kumail ibn Ziyad when he asked for a way to approach Allah:

In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful

O Allah, I ask You by Your Mercy which embraces all things,
By Your strength, through which You dominate all things,
towards which all things are humble, and before which all things are lowly;
By Your Invincibility, through which You overwhelm all things;
By Your Might, which nothing can resist;
By Your Greatness, which has filled all things;
By Your Power, which towers over all things;
By Your Face, which subsists after annihilation of all things;
By Your Names, which have filled the foundations of all things;
By Your Knowledge, which encompasses all things; and
By the Light of Your Face, through which all things are illumined!

O Light! O All-Holy!
O First of the first and Last of the Last!
O Allah, forgive me the sins which tear apart safeguards!
O Allah, forgive me the sins which bring down adversities!
O Allah, forgive me the sins which alter blessings!
O Allah, forgive me the sins which hold back supplication!
O Allah, forgive me the sins which dash all hopes!
O Allah, forgive me the sins which bring about tribulation!
O Allah, forgive me every sin I have committed
and every mistake I have made!
O Allah, verily I seek nearness to You through remembrance of You,
I seek intercession from You with Yourself, and I ask You through Your Munificence, to bring me nearer to Your Mercy, to bless me with gratitude to You and to inspire me with Your remembrance.

Shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist

I have been missing Kuching. Huhu. I miss Kuching and its calm drivers. I miss ambal and midin and Tea-C. I miss having breakfast with him in the rain. I miss not having to mengadap PC dan berfikir tetapi mengedet dan shopping. I miss listening to Dewa 19 in his car. I miss being dependent: on my parents and on him. I miss cruising with him with Kuching lights shining on us. I miss my parents' chirpy holiday mood. I miss not having to menanti komuter selama sejam, instead, having him to pick me up whenever, wherever. I miss dressing cute for mengedet. I miss him. I miss my calm, cheerful mood. I miss my holiday. Huhuhu // But today, Kano and I when to Sogo's Ramadhan preview sale; the entire Sogo is opened for sale (up until 90%) for only 2 days, but only for Sogo card holder. Ehem, I am. And I had a great fun! Retail therapy memang syoklah. Hilang kerinduan pada holiday moodku (although I still terribly miss you, You). Patutlah orang kaya nampak macam happy saja. Orang Kaya atau Orang Beriman. I am neither. Itulah macam weng-weng tu. Huhu. Anyways, Kano and I were like 2 kids in a candy shop, teruja dan bahagia, bersembang tak berhenti, berjalan tak berhenti, survey sana-sini. Kami masuk ke Sogo selepas Maghrib selepas menikmati sate Kajang, dan keluar selepas jam 10. Ngeh ngeh. Nasib baik tak teruja dengan melampau. "Kalau nak berjimat tu, boleh aje". Hehe. Both of us were very satisfied with our purchases. Yours truly bought a new Elle wallet, which she loves loves loves! (Dan lebih suka kerana ada seseorang di Kuching itu akan reimburse bayaran perkara ini. Eheh) // Anyways, Ramadhan is approaching. Alhamdulillah. I pray for a better Ramadhan this year, insyaAllah. Selamat mengimarahkan Ramadhan, Brothers and Sisters.

Mungkin aku pernah juga merasakan cinta

Tapi tak pernah seindah ini
Mungkin aku juga pernah merasakan rindu

Tapi tak pernah sedalam ini
Mungkin kamu takkan pernah percaya

Bahwa sesungguhnya aku telah terjatuh
Kuakui aku telah larut

Larut ke dalam kamu yang kucintai

Adinda bersumpah jikalau kekanda tidak kembali
Adinda akan menyusul kekanda
Memijak pada tanah yang sama
Bernafas pada udara yang sama

Sepulangnya adinda dari bumi bertuah (tetapi tercemar) Port Dickson, adinda merasakan bahawa adinda telah meninggalkan sebahagian kecil hati adinda di sana. Paling utama, di suatu sanktuari kecil adinda, di balkoni apartment itu, di kerusi selesa itu, tempat di mana adinda mengadap lautan permai (kerana apartment kami tiada pantai, bersambung terus dengan lautan, indah). Hampir setiap masa. Kadangkala untuk membaca. Tetapi selalunya untuk bermenung sahaja. Sungguh indah perasaan itu. Anyways, yours truly a.k.a. adinda is leaving for Kuching this evening, with ma familia. "Kakanda, nantikan adinda!!!!" Relevan? Ngeh ngeh. Dan kalian semua, terutamanya fellowship di pejabat, don't miss me too much!!! Hehehe.

No man needs a vacation so much as the person who has just had one

After sunset on the night of Middle of Sha`ban, Allah in His great mercy and kindness turns towards His creation and asks, "Is there anyone who would seek My forgiveness and I forgive him (or her)? Is there anyone who is in need to ask Me and I provide for his (or her) needs. Is there anyone who is in pain and seeks My help and I help him (or her)? Is there? Is there?”, until the time of Dawn.

Pagi semalam, sebelum kemasukan kita umat Islam ke pertengahan Syaaban, di mana lembaran buku yang baru dibuka dan diterima, aku kemalangan. Antara Kembara dengan motosikal, ketika dalam perjalanan ke Mahkamah. Aku yakin aku tidak bersalah, tetapi secara naturalnya, naluri aku amat mengasihani Encik itu kerana dia kesakitan dan mendapat MC 2 minggu (itu saja yang diberitahu melalui SMS itu), sedangkan aku tidak. Aku mohon doa agar Encik itu selamat sahaja selepas ini. Walaupun aku yakin aku tak bersalah (juga selepas mendapatkan 2nd 3rd 4th 5th opinions) lantas tidaklah gentar akan apa-apa tuntutan hatta tuntutan Mahkamah sekalipun, aku mohon tiada apa-apa yang akan berlaku. Tetapi hati masih gundah. Malah trauma akan motosikal serta bayangan motosikal yang direka oleh fikiran paranoidku ini. Huhu. Lagi, malam semalam aku terdengar puisi karya Masuri SN (tidak tahu tajuk, tapi dibikin pada 1991) di IKIM, sangat indahnya, aku cuba cari tapi tak terjumpa. Siapa tahu/ada?

Choice has always been a privilege of those who could afford to pay for it

Dear all, mari merapik /// Aku nak beritahu, aku baru habis baca Joanne Harris' latest bestseller, Gentlemen & Players. Aku suka. Maka aku ingin recommend kepada kalian. Now that I already know the twist, aku fikir, aku akan baca sekali lagi /// Buku kan ada banyak kategori, setuju? Buku Tak Best. Buku Berlagak (read: big words, blaah story). Buku Best Yang Tidak/Belum Diulang Baca; laksana: The Time Traveler's Wife, The Dogs of Babel, The Zahir, Man & Boy. Buku Best Yang Diulang Berkali-Kali; laksana: Chocolat (Joanne Harris tentunya), The Wedding, Tuesdays With Morrie, Daddy Long Legs /// Tadi aku beli buku di KLCC itu (mengular seketika ketika Legal Aid break): The Secret Life of Bees, jadi esok aku akan masuk ke alam baru. Tata /// Speaking of KLCC, tadi aku jumpa Aliza, my junior from STF dan kami berborak di Kinokuniya sambil berdiri selama lebih 1/2 jam. Sangat gembira buat Kinokuniya itu macam rumah sendiri. The funny thing was, Aliza mengecam aku dek kerana hidungku. Wow amat prominent. Ngeh ngeh /// Sungguh ramai orang kawin (juga topik perbincangan aku dan Aliza yang comel itu). Ramai orang tunang juga. Mereka ini membuat aku 'tak larat' (an STFians' slang for 'perasaan yang berbunga-bunga'). Contohnya Faridah yang comel dan hubbynya yang equally comel telah membuat aku dan Ayin lebih-lebih 'tak larat' pada suatu hari di hujung minggu lepas. Semoga bahagia sampai syurga /// Aku dah nak habis chambering tapi tak ada tempat kerja lagi. Aku rasa aku nak cuti dululah. Kah kah /// Aku adalah tak suka taken-for-granted-feeling. You know? /// Aku macam nak pergi PD minggu ni, firm trip (aku sebenarnya menyibuk join Muamalat department which I don't belong to), tapi I am sure I am in for fun. Aku juga macam nak pergi ke Kuching minggu hadapan (mode berbunga-bunga, faham-fahamlah ya) bersama keluarga, to a very close family friend's daughter's engagement (there, semua orang nak kawin) /// Korang (especially Yatt), best ke cerita Realiti yang ganti Gol & Gincu kegemaranku itu? /// Ooh bintat aku kembali. Dan kali ini lebih kesakitannya, maka sepulangnya aku dari court semalam, aku telah ke klinik dan menghadapi satu minor surgery membuangnya, maka aku telah mendapat leave semalam (baca: sangat gembira despite the pain) /// Aku sukalah budak Kim from ANTM5 itu. Kenapa next week dia macam perlu buat perangai? Hampeh /// Aku tak suka Miss Teen USA 2006, apakah jawapan dia tentang maksud Integrity? Apakah aku pekak? Atau aku yang budus? /// Gilmore Girls kembali!! Lorelai dan Luke sangat comel!!! /// Speaking of Luke, he is on top of my Hotness list right now, bersama-sama Dr. Syeikh Muzaffar (!!!) (our (one of) very 1st angkasawan), Sham Kamikaze (he is back reigning!) and Sazzy Falaq (eik?) ///